Charles Barkley Better Alabama Governor Than Anti-Gambling Riley?
Even though he was just arrested New Year's Eve for DUI, Charles Barkley may be a more effective governor for the state of Alabama than the present state leader, Bob Riley. Barkley, the former National Basketball Association star, has said he is considering a run for the office in 2014, assuming Riley hasn't bankrupted the state before then.
Riley insists on spending state funds to conduct expensive, resource-consuming investigations into the dire peril posed by electronic bingo, rather than tax Alabama's latest fad and cover at least a part of the huge budget deficit. Riley has stated he'd rather eliminate (allegedly) illegal gambling than use it to help the state's needy.
Barkley may have shown poor judgement in driving after drinking, but his reasoning for running a Scottsdale, Arizona, stop sign was crystal clear. The Round Mound of Rebound told arresting officers he was in a rush to get a blowjob from a woman who had a week before given him the best oral sex in his life.
Such determination and focus on a goal may seem even Presidential, a la Bill Clinton, rather than merely gubernatorial. Meanwhile, Riley takes bingo to task as if hypnotic casinos were luring Alabama residents into ruin. Who is the best governor?
Riley wants to remove a potential revenue source; Barkley might fund the source all by himself, if his gambling past is any indication. Barkley has joked that a $100,000 fine levied against an NBA player was no big deal because "it only amounts to two hands of blackjack." Barkley was also sued by Wynn Resorts for non-payment of $400,000 in markers, which he subsequently covered.
Barkley would bring a far more interesting entourage to the governor's mansion. While Riley attracts US Representative Spencer Bachus and other evangelistic zealots, Barkley was partying on New Year's Eve with Michael Strahan and Urkel. Imagine the Jet, Kenny Smith, sending anti-gambling task force head David Barber out to sea in his TNT Gone Fishin' segment.
Even Spencer Bachus may be won over when he sees how deeply his namesake, Bacchus, resides in Barkley's soul. Even if Alabama didn't make it through its crises, at least it could dance off bogeying, rather than marching to a funeral dirge... and that's if Riley hasn't outlawed dancing. Who's the better governor?
